Yeah! Take THAT Google! Nobody needs you anymore! All we need is our phones, text messaging, and a company named after a Soviet-era government agency that was known for its brutality to help us find our way!

Okay, sure, so, KGB sounds like a pretty fun service. But, come on, guys — as if we’re going to ask KGB the number of the closest escort service or what the average penis length is. It’s just not happening — and as long as there’s adult entertainment, Google will reign supreme.

SMS your searches…